Graphic courtesy of Patrick Toman.
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Banned From Duckburg
The obligatory "Banned From Argo" parody. (Lar, you sicko, this is all your fault.)
My first completed Buffy the Vampire Slayer filk, written during the end of the third season. Updated, March 2000.
How To Survive A Murder Mystery
Or, "Scream" In Song. Seconds after I wrote this one, I called my friend Merav and sadly informed her, "I am evil and must be destroyed." Upon hearing it, she agreed. Upon hearing it a second time, she changed her mind and decided that I am evil and must be encouraged.
For the record: I wrote this one in 1995, some four years before Weird Al Yankovic released "The Saga Continues."
And I still think mine is better.
The Klingon Makeup Lament
Co-written with Merav Hoffman. Because it really does look like that.
The Man In The Shadows
Written during the sixth season of The X-Files.
Inspired by the entire seven-season run of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (but especially the first season -- and last episode). Written with the help of Merav Hoffman and Seanan McGuire.
Raise the Stakes
A Sky Too Blue
Inspired by the Gargoyles episode "Hunter's Moon."
The Three Fine Slayers of Rupert Giles
Co-written with Merav Hoffman and Seanan McGuire. Inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer and by Eddie From Ohio.
To the Gargoyles filk
My first ever filk inspired by Lois McMaster Bujold's Vorkosigan books - specifically, by the character of Cordelia Naismith Vorkosigan. Based mostly on the novel Barrayar.
Dried Frog Pills
If you read Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels, you may have noticed the running gag about the favorite remedy for the mentally unstable - i.e., everybody.
Fangorn's Marching Song
Lost for quite some time and resurrected in honor of the cinematic success of Lord Of The Rings. Yay for Ents.
The Faerie Queen Went Down To Georgia
The first time I heard Heather Alexander's "Faerie Queen", I said to myself, Good ghod, it's "Tam Lin" meets "The Devil Went Down To Georgia." And that, boys and girls, is where creativity demons come from.
A Flower for Algernon
Inspired, of course, by the novella Flowers for Algernon.
Updated! Riddle Song
Based on Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Original concept by Kiri Morgan.
(Edited because Ginny is not, in fact, short for Virginia. Good thing 'Ginevra' scans just as well.)
Stop the Wheel of Time, I Want to Get Off
Co-written with Merav Hoffman. Inspired, if that is the word, by Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series. Quite possibly the snarkiest filksong I've ever written.
This one came out of Current 93's rendition of the Tam Lin ballad, one of the Margaret variants (as opposed to the earlier Janet ones). In this particular version, when Margaret comes upon Tamlin in the woods, he doesn't waste much time arguing with her: "And he took her by the milk-white hand, / And by the grass-green sleeve; / He pulled her down at the foot o' the bush, / He never once asked her leave."
And as in most of the versions, when she's carrying his child, he asks her to come and save his life. After hearing that one, I started wondering why she would bother.
A Thousand Ships, Take Two
Because after all, who really launched those thousand ships? Co-written with Merav Hoffman and Seanan McGuire. Inspired by Pegasus nominee "A Thousand Ships" by Kerstin Dröge.
A song of mourning for some things that should never have to die. Inspired by Guy Gavriel Kay's novel of the same name.
Are You Out There?
Not quite autobiographical, but close enough to a feeling we've all had every now and then. This is dedicated to everyone who cried at the end of E.T. because they wished they could leave with him.
Updated! The Baby Sister's Here
For everybody who's ever created, or been tempted to create, a Mary Sue. (A variant on a concept by Merlin Missy, used with her permission.)
Closer To Fen
Apparently this one's been done by some others, too. And this time I can't honestly claim that mine's better (I'm particularly fond of Rennie Levine's "FIAWOL (Filking Is A Way Of Life)," which includes the line "We go to the circles, we go through the workshops / We sit in on the panels, and we stand up for the one-shots"). But this one is autobiographical, so it's still unique in its own way.
Co-written with Seanan McGuire; tune by Merav Hoffman. Dedicated to the online community of #filkhaven and the memory of September 11, 2001. Winner of the Contata 2002 songwriting contest.
Hello, Remember Us?
I Wanna Be Peter David
Co-written with my husband Alex, who knows more than I do about what PAD writes in the comic book world.
Please note: the disparagement of other writers in this piece in no way reflects the filker's actual feelings about them. Well...except the one about Shatner.
Not Enough Filk at the Con
Because some cons just don't respect their filkers.
A Simple Desultory Filksong
I wrote this one 'cause my friend Lauren dared me to. Fifty points if you can identify all the references.
Sleep on the Train
Too many late nights, both before and at conventions ... but there's always time to sleep on the way there, or on the way back.
Patrick Toman started this one for me by asking how I pronounced my last name (Levin, at the time), and when I told him (le-VEEN), said "Good."
Why good? I asked him.
Because it would scan nicely to "There's a girl in New York City who calls herself the human trampoline," from Paul Simon's "Graceland," he answered.
You're writing a filk about me? I asked him.
As soon as I figure out what scans to "Graceland," he said.
About a week later I sent him this, with thanks.
Your Con's Name Here
A fannish anthem for all of us.
Heather's "March Of Cambreadth" is one of my favorite fighting songs -- savage and proud of it, with the refrain that pretty much sums up any battle strategy: How many of them can we make die?
This one, though, is about the battle that goes on behind the lines ... with a rather different objective. One might consider it the other side of the warrior's song.
I Love Ose
If I ever get the chance, I'm going to sing this one opposite Paul Kwinn's "Stop Singing Ose Or I'll Kill You."
Long after the Faire is gone, a man still asks after one who lives there.
Eat It Slow
Co-written with Josh Kronengold. This is what happens when you go out for dessert with filkers.
A song about the popular game set in the London Underground.
Threes: The Jolly Butcher
"The Jolly Butcher" is a faintly bawdy traditional song, which I first heard rendered by Great Big Sea. And which shortly thereafter I discovered can be sung to the tune of Mercedes Lackey's "Threes." All it needed was the choruses....
Because every nice Jewish filker chick ought to write at least one Christmas song.
...Wait, no, that's totally wrong. I didn't want to write this one, but it insisted.
Under the Kitten Beast
Cat Faber's "Under The Gripping Beast" meets the Theory of Cat Gravity.
Come on, you know it's true.
When Giants Return
On Dave Clement's album Ramblin' the Galaxy, there is a beautiful rendition of Stan Rogers's "Giant." Somehow or other that song got mixed up in my head with Kathy Mar's "When Giants Walked." This is what came out.
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